Hot ka-friggin' damn. I have to take the drat-blasted SATs again. Friggin' shit. You know how I did on my critical reading? 99%. Ninety-friggin-nine freaking percent! That's almost perfect. ALMOST FRIGGIN' PERFECT! You have any idea how proud I am of that?
You know how I did on my writing and reasoning and shit? 97%. A FREAKING NINETY HOT DAMN SEVEN. So why the hell in a friggin' handbasket am I not jumping for friggin' joy over here?
You know how I did on my friggin' hell-or-high-water math section?
77%.
7 7 %
A HOT DAMN FRIGGIN SEVENTY FREAKING SEVEN. THAT IS FAILING. THAT IS FLUNKING. THAT IS THE LOWEST SCORE I'VE EVER GOTTEN ON A MATH TEST.
That's like a 616 or something. Last time I took the SATs I got a 600. AND LAST TIME I TOOK THIS TEST I WAS IN THE EIGHTH FREAKING GRADE.
EIGHTH GRADE. Eighth grade! Eighth grade, I didn't know half the math, I practically did BETTER than I did my hot-damn junior friggin year. Especially considering inflation and conversion and that hella shit shit.
My friggin' essay actually went down, you know something? It went DOWN. From a 10 to an 8, three hella shit years later. Hot ka-holy friggin' damn shit. Sorry for ruining the beautiful friggin' picture of me y'all have in your heads of this nice blonde girl who spazzes out sometimes but never friggin' curses. Hot damn. I'm real sorry.
You know what you can't do to make up for a score on the general test? You can't take a hot-damn subject test is the hella shit you can't do. No, you hafta take the entire hot-damn hell-or-high-water friggin' general test all over again.
Three more hella shit hours out of your friggin' life because you can't take the hot-damn hell friggin' shit subject test to make up for a bad friggin' day of math. One friggin' bad day of math in your friggin' life and you have to pay again and colleges see it. You know that? They will know that I did this badly and had to take the hot-damn hella shit piss test again. You know what it says when you hafta take the friggin' SATs twice? And your mom's in the next room telling you it means you friggin' know your friggin' limits and crap, and know that some shit was going on that day and you can do it friggin' better than you did.
But you know what I think?
I think what colleges see is that you needed another year of studying on the stupid everything section of the stupid hot-damn test because you're so remedial you got a hot-damn 77% on math and you dropped your essay score from when you took the hella friggin' shit test in the friggin' eighth grade, because you can't pay any attention in hella shit ENGLISH CLASS and even though you're a junior you get stuck on the most basic friggin' hot-damn MATH problems so you don't have time to finish the hot-damn fifteen questions at the end!
HOT DAMN HELLA SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIIIIIT.
Great. So now I have to go to a friggin' hell-in-a-handbasket friggin' TUTOR to tell me how to go through the hot-damn test friggin' BOOKLET and locate all the problems that are remedial enough that I can friggin' do them without spraining my cerebrum and then go back to the "hard" hot-damn problems later. I hafta go learn how to PACE MYfriggin'SELF.
You know what colleges let you in with a score of 600 whatthefreakingever in math? NONE OF THEM.
NO FRIGGIN' COLLEGE IN THE COUNTRY THAT I WANT TO ATTEND WILL ACCEPT THAT MATH SCORE.
EVEN AGAINST A NINETY-FRIGGIN-HELLA-SHIT-NINE IN CRITICAL FREAKING READING.
You know what the worst of this is?
...How the hell am I ever going to top a 99% in critical reading?
What if I go down...
Straight A's since fourth grade. Since they started giving letter grades. Straight A's... and now I have to retake the SAT. Now I have to go to a tutor for test-taking, which was never before a problem...
What are admissions officers at colleges going to say? "Look at this girl. Brilliant GPA, third in her class, A's all around... with an SAT math score like that. At least she retook it."
I don't want to have an SAT score "like that". No way. I know I am better than that score.
So of course I'll retake the test and actually study this time, and go to a tutor for test-taking skills...
I can't retake it until next fall...
So there's no point in stressing about it now, right?...
Right...
You know how I did on my writing and reasoning and shit? 97%. A FREAKING NINETY HOT DAMN SEVEN. So why the hell in a friggin' handbasket am I not jumping for friggin' joy over here?
You know how I did on my friggin' hell-or-high-water math section?
77%.
7 7 %
A HOT DAMN FRIGGIN SEVENTY FREAKING SEVEN. THAT IS FAILING. THAT IS FLUNKING. THAT IS THE LOWEST SCORE I'VE EVER GOTTEN ON A MATH TEST.
That's like a 616 or something. Last time I took the SATs I got a 600. AND LAST TIME I TOOK THIS TEST I WAS IN THE EIGHTH FREAKING GRADE.
EIGHTH GRADE. Eighth grade! Eighth grade, I didn't know half the math, I practically did BETTER than I did my hot-damn junior friggin year. Especially considering inflation and conversion and that hella shit shit.
My friggin' essay actually went down, you know something? It went DOWN. From a 10 to an 8, three hella shit years later. Hot ka-holy friggin' damn shit. Sorry for ruining the beautiful friggin' picture of me y'all have in your heads of this nice blonde girl who spazzes out sometimes but never friggin' curses. Hot damn. I'm real sorry.
You know what you can't do to make up for a score on the general test? You can't take a hot-damn subject test is the hella shit you can't do. No, you hafta take the entire hot-damn hell-or-high-water friggin' general test all over again.
Three more hella shit hours out of your friggin' life because you can't take the hot-damn hell friggin' shit subject test to make up for a bad friggin' day of math. One friggin' bad day of math in your friggin' life and you have to pay again and colleges see it. You know that? They will know that I did this badly and had to take the hot-damn hella shit piss test again. You know what it says when you hafta take the friggin' SATs twice? And your mom's in the next room telling you it means you friggin' know your friggin' limits and crap, and know that some shit was going on that day and you can do it friggin' better than you did.
But you know what I think?
I think what colleges see is that you needed another year of studying on the stupid everything section of the stupid hot-damn test because you're so remedial you got a hot-damn 77% on math and you dropped your essay score from when you took the hella friggin' shit test in the friggin' eighth grade, because you can't pay any attention in hella shit ENGLISH CLASS and even though you're a junior you get stuck on the most basic friggin' hot-damn MATH problems so you don't have time to finish the hot-damn fifteen questions at the end!
HOT DAMN HELLA SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIIIIIT.
Great. So now I have to go to a friggin' hell-in-a-handbasket friggin' TUTOR to tell me how to go through the hot-damn test friggin' BOOKLET and locate all the problems that are remedial enough that I can friggin' do them without spraining my cerebrum and then go back to the "hard" hot-damn problems later. I hafta go learn how to PACE MYfriggin'SELF.
You know what colleges let you in with a score of 600 whatthefreakingever in math? NONE OF THEM.
NO FRIGGIN' COLLEGE IN THE COUNTRY THAT I WANT TO ATTEND WILL ACCEPT THAT MATH SCORE.
EVEN AGAINST A NINETY-FRIGGIN-HELLA-SHIT-NINE IN CRITICAL FREAKING READING.
...You know what I see,
when I look at my high school report card?
A line of A's.
You know what I don't see?
A single B.
Since Freshman year.
All A's, all the time.
Last semester I got an A-.
I still wound up third in the class.
All A's, all the time...
Even in math. Even in chemistry.
And now this.
when I look at my high school report card?
A line of A's.
You know what I don't see?
A single B.
Since Freshman year.
All A's, all the time.
Last semester I got an A-.
I still wound up third in the class.
All A's, all the time...
Even in math. Even in chemistry.
And now this.
You know what the worst of this is?
...How the hell am I ever going to top a 99% in critical reading?
What if I go down...
Straight A's since fourth grade. Since they started giving letter grades. Straight A's... and now I have to retake the SAT. Now I have to go to a tutor for test-taking, which was never before a problem...
What are admissions officers at colleges going to say? "Look at this girl. Brilliant GPA, third in her class, A's all around... with an SAT math score like that. At least she retook it."
I don't want to have an SAT score "like that". No way. I know I am better than that score.
So of course I'll retake the test and actually study this time, and go to a tutor for test-taking skills...
I can't retake it until next fall...
So there's no point in stressing about it now, right?...
Right...
...So why do I feel like crying?
.
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